Cosplay Party!
by Anpan Roller
Summary: Not as innocent as title sounds. A collection of super kinky 8059's role-playing moments. PURPOSELESS YAOI; mostly 8059, may contain other characters or threesomes; swearing courtesy of Gokudera. Other pairings so far: D18
1. Nurse, Doctor, Patient

**A/N: **Hi! So I'm getting hormonal and decided to start a series of kinky 8059 role-playing moments. I swear I have been reading too much yaoi for my own good, and twisted my mind to what it is today. I thank thee, doujinshis and fanfics.

Just a warning though, Gokudera and Yamamoto and almost everybody will be super OOC, because let's admit it, we're all gathered here today for the porn. And I'm sorry to start off with a threesome, because I can't stop fantasizing when I'm doing my chemistry homework! (And there were test tubes and solutions and stuff!) And there may be other pairings when I feel like it. (Especially D18 with Hibari's new super suggestive weapon and Dino's whip!! Amano-sensei is testing our limits!!) AND! It will be updated as and when I like, because I am a very busy person. *nods nods*

So now that I've established the explicitness and senselessness of these perverted fics, please enjoy.

Roles of the day: Patient, Nurse and Doctor (**TYL!59x80x59**)  
_P.S. TYL!59 will be referred to as "Hayato"_

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**Infirmaries Can't Be Entered Unless You're Seriously Injured**

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It was barely a second ago when Yamamoto felt nauseous and was ready to throw up anytime, but the moment he caught sight of the provocative nurse changing behind the translucent curtains, it was as if that was all the cure he needed. He felt better already.

He watched as the stand-in assistant pulled his shirt over his head and tossing it away, before grudgingly sliding effortlessly into a one-piece uniform Yamamoto couldn't quite make out of. But hell, the moment he reached under the dress and dropped his pants down, Yamamoto fell in love with it immediately.

The nurse stomped over to his bed, and yanked the closed fabric open. "Yeah what the fuck's your problem?" he grunted, scowling even more forcefully than ever.

Yamamoto laughed, and ignored the question - or rather, demand. "Gokudera looks cute in this nurse costume!" he commented, acknowledging the stirrings going on in between his legs.

Gokudera was clad in a pink attire, with sky-high hemlines that ended a few inches below his butt. The top half was buttoned on, with the exception of the first two buttons, which were left opened - dare he say it - deliberately. In addition to that, because Gokudera happened to be studying in the nurse's office before Yamamoto rushed in with his accident, the Italian had his notorious silver hair lazily tied up in a little tail, with stray strands falling attractively into place. His glasses were perched on top of his more-than-perfect nose bridge. Yamamoto was no fashion expert, but even he could tell Gokudera's porcelain skin matched the pink of the costume perfectly.

Gokudera scowled, "Shut up! If you hadn't banged the bloody door open so suddenly I wouldn't have knocked over my coffee and dirty my clothes and be forced to wear whatever was in the closet which happened to be this fucking thing! I swear if anyone came in and saw me like this your father'll be having idiot sashimi for dinner tonight!" Then, he hissed resentfully, "Stupid Shamal... Of all days to go on an emergency and leaving me to fucking stand in for you!"

Yamamoto laughed again in an attempt to calm the smoking bomber down - no pun intended. "Maa, maa! I think you're going to do a good job being a nurse! Even when you're just standing there I think my pain went away already!" Well, the nurse uniform did deserve its due credits.

Red tainted Gokudera's face, both from the anger and the embarrassment. Not wanting to dwell on this topic any longer, he barked again, "Shut up. If you do not need my medical attention then scram. I have better things to do." He purposely added the 'medical' in front of the 'attention', knowing full well what would be the answer if he hadn't stated explicitly.

Yamamoto clutched his abdomen and doubled over immediately. "Actually, I think the pain just came back," he announced.

Gokudera stuck his hand on his hips and rolled his eyes, "You're a terrible actor. Stop wasting my time."

Determined, Yamamoto collapsed.

"Not falling for that," Gokudera informed, and began to march away from him. He walked past the foot of the bed, and stole a glance at the stationary boy. He reminded himself that it was all an act again, peeled his eyes away and continued moving. When he picked up his dirtied shirt on lying on the floor, he peeked again at Yamamoto, who was still as frozen as his brain was. Gokudera thinned his lips, contemplated for a while, and sighed heavily.

"Oi, are you really alright?" he nudged with his foot at the Japanese. There was no response, so he jabbed at him a few more times.

And then he noticed that really microscopic twinkle in his extremely narrow slits of eye. That idiot's eyes were half-opened! That imbecile! And that blatantly obvious smile that's starting to tug at his lips pissed Gokudera even more. As if trying cool down his anger, a gust of cold air from the air conditioner blew, and Gokudera felt especially breezy down there.

Mother-effing shit he forgot he was wearing a damned skirt.

Gritting his teeth at his loss this round, he heeled Yamamoto hard in the face before quickly backing down, tugging at the hems of his skirt like a shy schoolgirl. "Watch what the fuck you're looking at!" he threatened.

Yamamoto jolted up straight and rubbed his bruised nose. But he quickly recovered and chuckled again. "Gokudera's wearing my favourite today."

Gokudera's face grew such a deep shade of scarlet red it was as if his head would explode any moment. Before he could open his mouth to shout back, Yamamoto laid back down, and flashed a contented grin, saying, "Isn't Gokudera supposed to take my clothes off for check-up?"

Gokudera spat, "Hell no. You have hands to do the job for you."

"Isn't that what nurses are supposed to do?"

Gokudera folded his arms over his chest, and retorted, "I'm underpaid and overworked. Live with it."

Yamamoto then proudly flashed his arm with Band-Aids plastered everywhere, boasting, "My arm is injured. I can't take off my clothes by myself."

He was about to answer back, when his rationality told him that the wisest move at the moment would be to put to good use the policy of appeasement, for instant and effective shutting up of the mouth. "Fine," he groaned, making sure his irritation was apparent. "Where?"

Gokudera carefully lifted up his baseball shirt, which smelt so warmly of Yamamoto right now, and had a slightly rude shock when he saw the large patch of redness spreading from his left hip to inside his pants. Gokudera had to tug the ends of his fitting pants a little lower, just marginally, to catch a full glimpse of the unsightly swell. "That's where the bat hit me, haha," Yamamoto explained.

Gokudera's furious blush drained immediately at the sight of his lover's injury. He furrowed his eyebrows in intense concentration, as he inspected the swollen area. He tapped his fingers on his chin thoughtfully as he tried recalling every medical book he had read to put to good use here.

Yamamoto, on the other hand, was leaning against the propped-up pillow quite blissfully, with Gokudera's head placed in such a satisfyingly suggestive position. That is, until a sharp pain shot up his spine. "Ow!" he exclaimed, straightening his back.

Gokudera looked up, his glasses now fallen to just the tip of his nose. "Sorry, did that hurt?" he apologised casually.

Gritting his teeth in an attempt to restrain himself from squealing at the adorable look on Gokudera's face, Yamamoto replied, "Yeah, a little."

"I'll be more gentle then," Gokudera promised in a professional way, before impatiently returning to examine the injury.

His fingers drew feather-light touches across Yamamoto's firm skin, sending millions of volts of electricity striking up the Rain Guardian's body. He bit down sharply on his lips to prevent those impeding moans from escaping. But there was no stopping that honest fellow down there.

Gokudera noticed the growing bulge in between the figure-hugging pants, and from then on became increasingly distracted by that. Some remedy for the wound was already on the tip of his tongue, before the Projection of Doom made its grand appearance. He tried shaking it off and attempted to recall the escaped information. But soon, somehow the stroking meant for inspection were reduced to pure, mindless stroking. Gokudera decided that he'd given up on that battle tactic long ago, and should move on to a new one. Besides, looking at the way Yamamoto's clenching his eyes shut and practically chewing on his lips, it seemed that neither of them are complaining.

Really, Gokudera had an amazingly strong resistance to temptations, nothing anyone said could ever sway him, except Tsuna of course. But perhaps his manhood and him were of two separate articles; its tolerance level was akin to that of Hibari's when he's having a bad hair day and lost his gel.

He caught sight of one strand of a short raven-black hair that strayed from the pants, and a smirk crept upon his lips. It's payback time for the humiliating defeat he suffered just now. He pressed the the tip of his index finger on it, trapping the thread, and began to rub it on the smooth skin.

Yamamoto pried his eyes open, and the scene that greeted him just made his buckle more acutely painful than ever. Gokudera with his ponytail that's starting to fall apart and jade green eyes that's almost covered by his long eyelashes, chin in hand as he toyed about with the strand sexily, and not forgetting the part where his arched back made his butt stick so seductively into the air, Yamamoto was at his limits.

"Go-Gokudera... Nn-!"

An evil crooked smile hung on Gokudera's lips when he cupped his hands over the tortured anatomy, and gave it a forceful sqeeze. Yamamoto yelped again in pain. When Gokudera released the victim from his clutches, he proceeded to parting the zippers on the pants where its fabric were directed towards the centre. "This is punishment for tricking me. Serves you right!" Gokudera chided. Even though he meant it quite literally, it was not his fault that the baseball idiot had another thing on his mind at the moment.

Tucking his hair behind his ear and positioning himself, he smirked and threatened with revenge coating his words, "Now do I have to clean your wounds?"

Wet, callous tongue wrapped around the leaking erection, relieving its itch by sliding up and down so dangerously along the shaft. The tip of the tongue dipped about in every possible corner of the organ, leaving not an inch neglected. Gokudera's spit-filled lips then enclosed themselves around the head of the shaft, fanning humid, warm air over the hot skin and swirling his agile tongue about the bulb, before sinking in deep into the slit in continuous motion.

As much as Yamamoto hated to ruin the Italian's hairstyle, he had no other choice than to grab his head because the sensation was too unbearable. He didn't know if Gokudera's head bobbing up and down was voluntary, or as a result of his hand's reflex actions. But that's not the point right now, what was important was that god, it felt good.

"Nn-! Go-Gokudera! I'm... I'm co-...!!"

The crazy tides of pleasure crashed in, but withdrew as fast as they came when Gokudera ended his ministrations abruptly. Disappointment flooding his senses, Yamamoto panted in between breaths, "...Huh...?"

Smacking his lips before wiping off the fluid with the back of his hand, Gokudera huffed proudly, "Che. This is for tricking me just now. We're even."

Unwilling to admit defeat, Yamamoto gathered whatever remaining energy he had and heaved the exasperated nurse in, until Gokudera was kneeling over the athlete. Smiling with the smug look Gokudera hated to see - for he was perfectly aware of what would happen next - Yamamoto hurriedly slid the buttons on his dress off.

"Oi, idiot. Crap, not here damn it!" Gokudera berated, but apparently Yamamoto's range of hearing was selective.

The minute the last button was off Yamamoto's impetuous hand yanked the side of the dress right off his shoulder, and then lapped urgently at his pink bud. Arching his back instinctively, Gokudera chided in between gritted teeth, "Nn, baseball idiot... Not... Nn... here!!"

His tongue compliantly left the hard nipple. But it was promptly followed by a finger sliding under the fabric of Gokudera's wet boxers. His fingers tickled Gokudera, having been massaging about the rim of his entrance. He asked again, "Oh, then here?"

The silver-haired boy gave, or at least tried to, his partner a menacing glare. But the tension building up backfired the attempt, making him look like he was pleading instead. (Goddamn it he actually looked like he was begging that idiot!) And as I've said, his manhood was displaying distinct signs of enthusiasm.

God knows how long it had been. God knows how many times they screamed each other's name. God knows where Gokudera's underwear disappeared to. On second thoughts, maybe God didn't really want to know.

Gokudera was spread out on his back, his uniform now unrecognisable with one side hanging loosely off his arm. His dress was pulled up to his stomach, revealing only his delicate red sacs dripping with liquid from the shaft hidden under the cloth. His ponytail went berserk, leaving the rubber band freely wounded around a few obedient strands. His glasses were knocked lopsided, with only one side left perched on his ear. "Ahn- Yama- Yamamoto..." he gasped, arms wrapped tightly around the taller boy's neck as he was being knocked into.

Plunging deeper and deeper into Gokudera's familiar hole, and disregarding the soreness on his bruise, Yamamoto replied with the same amplitude, "Goku-dera..."

The rhythm of the thrustings were at a crescendo. The pounding got even more agitated, both of them feeling it come very, very soon. Right when Gokudera was in his nth time of moaning, a new voice joined in.

"Nyahahaha! Is this where the candies are?!?!"

Yamamoto and Gokudera paused immediately, shooting each other looks that spelt trouble. 'Lambo!' they mouthed at the same time.

They tried to remain extraordinarily still and quiet, not even daring to breathe despite their desperate need for oxygen. Even Yamamoto struggled to continue being frozen, for if he moved sounds of pleasure would erupt from their throats again, which was extremely bad given the current circumstances. Shit, the curtains were not even closed!

The bubbly footsteps drew closer at an amazingly fast pace, especially when the feet are those of a child. "Nyahaha! Lambo-san will eat ALL the candies here!"

Yamamoto watched as the shadow on the floor traipsed closer and closer, clearer and clearer. Until a familiar looking afro-head popped out from behind the curtains.

His jaws dropped.

Their jaws dropped.

Everyone screamed.

Gokudera and Yamamoto were too flustered to be able to do much, except to panic and continue screaming. While Lambo burst into tears at the ferocity of the 'manly' screams (and at the monsters in between their thighs) and habitually whipped out the Ten Years Bazooka from his very functional hair.

"Oh no not the bazooka!" Yamamoto exclaimed.

"Fuck! Giving free shows to one idiot is bad enough already!" Gokudera became hysterical.

'Boom!' A cloud of dust exploded, and finally settled, while the duo ransacked their brains for a suitable explanation.

However, in Adult Lambo's place stood a certain silver-haired Italian Right Hand Man. He was dressed in a white robe, what seemed to be a doctor's, complete with a stethoscope strung around his neck. "What the-?" he asked, at no one in particular. His expression was a startled one, more at the sudden leap to the past than at the intimate activity his teenage self was engaging in.

"Adult Go-Gokudera?" Yamamoto was the first to break the silence.

Gokudera's face scrunched up in bafflement that finally set into his system. "Wa-wait. Where is Adult Lambo? Shouldn't he be here instead? Why are you here instead of him? If I'm here you shouldn't be here. And shouldn't I not be here if you were here? And shouldn't the idiot cow not be there if the idiot cow was there...?" Gokudera halted his track of thoughts, before slapping himself on his forehead, "Urrgh! I just confused myself!!"

Hayato dusted his coat, and began theorizing, "Looks like the bazooka's malfunctioned again. That worthless contraption was such a piece of crap in your time. But don't worry, ten years later it is much better than what it is now." Hayato looked up at them.

Yamamoto probed somemore, curious, "Haha, why is Adult Gokudera dressed like a doctor?" He wanted to ask about the stethoscope, but later realised that he couldn't remember the name, and so stuck with a simplistic way of phrasing the question.

Adult Hayato glanced at his stethoscope. "Oh this? I'm taking medical courses now, just in case that stupid old man Shamal dies. Then I will take over his position."

Yamamoto could only laugh at the cunningness of his future boyfriend, and Gokudera grew secretly proud of his rational thinking. And then they froze when they remembered the entire embarrassment of the situation, and hastily tried to pull out, although Yamamoto was very reluctant to.

"Say," Hayato's serious tone was suddenly dipped with a flavour of interest. A little revenge plan was hatching up inside his brain. This might be a little difficult, given the time limit. But then again he's the fucking Storm Guardian of Vongola, hell he's the fucking strongest Right Hand Man in the mafia. Heaven forbids him if he fails in such an elementary task.

He marched over to where the two-teens-becoming-as-one were and landed his hand on Yamamoto's flushed cheeks. Leaning in so close the younger boy could feel the other man's breath, Hayato asked in a low voice, "You don't look too well. Do you want a check up?"

Uneasy with how close the man was to his boyfriend - even if he was his older self, Gokudera snapped, "Hey! What the fuck are yo-"

Yamamoto, too, started muttering, even though he felt like Jiro was prancing about in his chest and Kojiro fluttering about in his tummy. "I- I- I'm oka..."

Hayato pulled on a smirk, and ran his fingers down his jaws, neck, and to his chest. He skillfully massaged his the area, feeling a small, hard protrusion form. "Well, you look like you need one. Your heartbeat's abnormal."

Gokudera could feel Yamamoto harden again inside him, and like an endless cycle, he too, got hard. He watched as Hayato's thumb circled about Yamamoto's nipple on top of his shirt, and his lover's scarlet face etched with erotic pleasure. His logic broke down again, like it always did when Yamamoto dominated his body. Mouth hanging slightly open and teary eyes screaming for more, he clutched Yamamoto's sweaty hand, and led it under his skirt, and wrapped around his own erection. From then on Yamamoto's hand automatically did what it was supposed to do.

Nobody knew when did Hayato climb onto the bed, not even Hayato himself. Yamamoto felt the nimble hand cease its ministrations, and suddenly his nipples were hit by a breeze of cool air when his shirt was lifted up by surprise. Hayato's skin met again with the surface of his abused bud, rubbing and flicking about it again with gusto, very much like what he did with Gokudera.

"Ahn-!!" Yamamoto moaned through gritted teeth, playing with Gokudera's dick even more roughly. Gokudera had to ball the bedsheets to restrain himself.

Chuckling, Hayato leant in, whispering into Yamamoto's ear, "Like it? That's ten years worth of vengeance right here."

Yamamoto shuddered, and vented his excitement all onto Gokudera's mucuous and firm length. The younger pianist's member felt like it was burning, as he jerked his own hip forward and back in momentum against Yamamoto's hard one, building up the pressure again.

Yamamoto, feeling the friction acting on both his member and sensitive areola, had to slice his teeth into his lips at the gratification. Hearing the emissions of whimpers from the carnal nurse and moans from the lecherous doctor might be too much for him to bear.

"Ahn-! Yama-Yamamoto... I'm going to... to..."

Hot, boiling liquid spilt on the large, slimy hand. Gokudera felt his body throb along to his strong and powerful heartbeat. His dick pulsated with much force as well. Yamamoto's hand was still relentlessly engulfing it. His chest heaved up and down, as his hand accidentally landed on his chest and brushed against his exposed pink blossom. "Nn!" He let out a soft cry. Sh-Shit! Why is he so... lewd right now?! It can't be the fucking nurse costume damn it!

Hayato, finally deciding enough time was spent with the foreplay, roamed his fingers downwards. His fingers trickled along the swordsman's waist, before yanking his pants down to his knees.

His fingers slid into the cracks, as he lectured the teen, "Do you know, where is the most accurate place-" Yamamoto gripped Gokudera forcefully when a digit slid into his wet virgin hole. "-to take temperatures?"

And with that, callous fingers drove into the tight hole, rubbing about the walls and mounting the tension. Yamamoto, who had never felt this sort of heavenly indulgence before, threw his head back, panting in uncoordinated breaths. He had forgotten about the work his hand was performing, which happened to revive the green-eyed monster inside his boyfriend. A jealous and thick-headed Gokudera, not wanting to lose out to that man who appeared out of thin air, reached for the trembling palm, and placed it over his drooling mouth.

He parted his thirsty lips and started nipping at the wet fingers, licking, suckling and sometimes nibbling on it. His hip started to move in motion again, albeit weakly. "Nn..." A sliver of the barely audible cry escaped his puckered lips.

Yamamoto's jaws hung slightly open, his jaw muscles unable to hold on any longer. When his gaze flitted down and saw Gokudera nibbling at his fingers, he had to blink. Nope, he's not dreaming. "Goku-Gokudera...?" Why is Gokudera so proactive now, when he's never initiated anything in bed? Could it- Could it be the nurse costume?

"Doubting all these?" Hayato's slick voice broke his thoughts. He scoffed, "Idiot. Do you think I would ever put on such a ridiculous costume at all?"

Yamamoto's eyes widened, as he glanced at the flushing Gokudera. Giving a strengthless scowl, Gokudera stammered, although he intended to hiss, "I-It's only f-for today. Do-Don't f-fucking bet on it that I will... do it again."

Hayato chortled, both at his teenage self and at the white juice streaking down the insides of Yamamoto's thighs. The next second they know, the Italian doctor was inside his patient, pumping clumsily, for this was his first time doing this, okay, _these_; at being the seme, and taking part in a threesome. Holy hell he's a whole new level higher than that baseball idiot at home. He gloated mentally at the win, although his body was gloating at an entirely different matter.

Gokudera almost felt like he was dying, having just came and getting thrust forcefully into again. As lethargic as he felt, he couldn't complain much, the rhythmic thrilling sensation compensated for the exhaustion. He gave up on the wet fingers and dropped it using his chest as a platform. He arched his back, fists scrunching up the bedsheet over his head as gasps escaped his throat. His enervated tongue was hanging mildly off his salivated lips, a few stubborn trickles still dripping off the tip of it.

Yamamoto had to lean forward and support himself with his arms. The grinding on both his front and back was exhilarating, almost blissful. At first he was immobile, letting Hayato do the work pounding into the both of them. But he felt the inexperienced attacker grow strengthless, and decided to help out. Having the best motor coordination among the three of them, he met with Hayato's thrusts effortlessly, and slid away to meet with Gokudera's skin and raw. He could feel his legs trembling, and the patch across his waist was sore, but the pleasure of it all drowned the pain.

"I'm... co-comi-!" The patient's breathless voice gasped, and white liquid spilt into a pink and abused hole, spilling out of the core soon after.

As if it was all a chain reaction, the nurse and the doctor came too, squirting onto the clothes and into the virgin hole respectively, accompanied with grunts of pleasure.

Hayato slid out, aware of the urgency of it all. He rearranged his clothes fairly quickly. He stole a glance at the clock on the wall. Turning back to face the teenagers who are trying to pull out too, he announced with a weak smile on his mouth, "Che. We did it in four minutes. You guys are so easy."

Sitting up and tying his long-gone ponytail, Gokudera snapped tiredly, "Shut up. As if you didn't come within four minutes too."

Hayato opened his mouth and was about to give an intelligent retort, when suddenly another swift puff of smoke appeared. Yamamoto and Gokudera panicked again, as they scrambled to try to put on a decent face before the kid.

Lambo sat on the pillow, and looked around in astonishment. Then, his eyes teared up, and started brawling again, "Lambo-Lambo-san's candies are gone!! Waahh~!!"

"Hush Idiot Cow! If you start crying like this again they will see us!" Gokudera leapt forward to clamp his hand over Lambo's mouth. Yamamoto, too, attempted to calm down the wailing bovine.

A distant voice travelled into the room. "Lambo! Where are you! Urgh, where has he ran off to now? I shouldn't have agreed to bring him to school!"

Another voice came in. "Tsuna-kun, do you hear him crying? I think it's coming from the infirmary."

"I-Pin thinks Lambo's in there too!" It was a cute squeak this time.

A gruff and energetic yell joined in. "THAT LITTLE GUY COULD BE IN THERE TO THE EXTREME!!"

"Kufufu..."

"Anyone who dares wreck havoc in my territory will be bitten to death by me."

"HIIII!!! Hi-Hibari-san! He's just a kid!"

"Stop whining and hurry up go in there to find that stupid cow back, Dame-Tsuna."

What the...??? What is this, a massive search party for one retarded cow? Why is everyone gathered at this time? While the couple were busy trying to accept the weirdness of the situation and coming up with explanations, the group had already ventured into the room.

It took them two weeks to wipe the image of Gokudera in a nurse costume out of their mind, and forever to erase the emotional trauma they suffered. Shamal, who learnt of the incident, burnt the costume immediately.

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**A/N:** Lol, super long title. I apologise.

Oh yeah Gokudera seme for once! Ehheh, I had a great time relieving myself of my perverted fantasies. *gets depressed at corrupted mind* If you're wondering at the random and senseless pairing because Shamal would be a better candidate, it's because I think Shamal's too old (although hot) and it would be disgusting and disturbing to see an old man screwing two kids, worthy of nine continuous weeks of rinsing your eyeballs. Even though Hayato's still a pedophile in this case, at least he's a sexy pedophile, ne? :)

(And just to make things clear I'm against child porn as much as I'm against infanticide and other immoral stuff punishable by spending a day with grumpy Hibari locked up in a room.)

And special thanks to ExplosiveDevice for her advice! (And I recommend her 8059 fics too!)

So, I hope I relieved your perverted fantasies as well, and feel free to leave a review or PM requesting what other costumes you want to see them in, or drop by my profile to cast a vote! Or better yet, suggestions on how I can improve my lemon-writing skills! They may or may not be written depending on how functional my brain gets, but I'll try to write them if I could! They are all greatly appreciated! Thanks for reading!! :)


	2. Juice

**A/N**: This is a written for the prompt Yamamoto/Gokudera - juice, "Come on, squeeze harder." in khrfest at LJ. Still working on the neko fic, (and a gazillion other fics), sorry guys! This isn't exactly kinky or fits the idea of Cosplay Party!, but I think I shall just collate most of my yaoi fics here.

Hope you guys like it!

Roles of the day: Lemon Juice Maker, and Cleaner? (**8059**)

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**Next Time, We Buy From The Convenience Store**

_(Why do I always have long names.)_

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"You squeeze it like that." A large, tanned hand gave the yellow fruit an effortless squeeze, and a generous amount of glistening--slightly clear with hints of yellow--juice dripped from the half-cut flesh into the mug positioned below. After giving the lemon a few good concluding rubs to force all existing droplets out, Yamamoto looked up at the very focused Italian, and said, "You do it like this, and you get the juice, Gokudera."

Gokudera's lips tugged downwards, as a wrinkle surfaced between his eyebrows. "What?" he scoffed in a flat voice, incredulous. "That was exactly what I had been doing just now!" He removed the hand his chin was lying on, placing it out in front of him with an open palm in disbelief.

Yamamoto gave a good hearty laugh, and gently pushed the glass cup across the kitchen table towards the other man. "Maybe you are not putting enough strength into it," he suggested, reaching over for the tap facing Gokudera. He tiptoed a little to twist the knob open, before rinsing his sticky hands under the running water. "You need to know how to squeeze it properly, Gokudera."

"Che," Gokudera hissed, as he took another cut lemon which he obviously had issues with in hand. "Are you saying that I'm weak?"

Yamamoto could only deny any accusations the highly-suspicious Storm gathered, and be captured watching Gokudera do work. He watched as Gokudera's tongue licked his lips, leaving slightly flushed aftermath on the supple flesh. His dreamy orbs of eyes covered by his eyelids as he took in a deep breath, and cracking them open again, his narrow silver brows interlocking in determination, before raising his almost-bony elbow and crushing the helpless fruit into a pulp.

Shimmering acidic juice spewed in all directions instead, flying everywhere like comets, and landing in every possible place except the cup directly below.

The baseballer just burst into another thick laughter, very much humoured, while wincing at the stray strand that sting his eye. Gokudera's eyebrow twitched, his mouth jerking in so much frustration Yamamoto knew he was going to explode soon. Honestly, of all fucking things to be bad at, he had the be the one with problems squeezing a fucking lemon. Stupid fruit, for being so damn hard to make a decent juice out of, stupid house, for not owning a single piece of juicing contraption, stupid baseball idiot, for being better than him in squeezi-

Two long arms wrap around his waist, knocking him out of his rants. He felt a tingle slither down his spine when a ticklish sensation of Yamamoto's sharp chin resting on his shoulder arrived. He could feel Yamamoto's vocal cords vibrate as he spoke in a low voice, meant for only his juice-stained ear, "Take a break Gokudera, you've been at it the whole morning."

Gokudera gritted his teeth to put on a semblance of annoyance, although he's all too familiar with these sudden assaults of intimacy to fight back. "No, idiot," he hissed, "I promised Jyuudaime I will make him lemon juice, and as his right-hand man I must keep my- Oi! Wh-What are you...?"

Yamamoto ran the tip of his tongue gently across the vulnerable ear. "Helping you clean up," he responded,  
a blissful smirk hanging in place.

Gokudera's shoulders tensed up at the feather-light tickles, resisting unconvincingly in a cracked voice, "Stop it..." His grip on the unreasonably abused fruit slackened. "We still have to make..."

"Then let's quickly get it over and done with," Yamamoto mentioned. He put on a smile as his other hand travelled tenderly along the length of Gokudera's white ones, landing on top of his hand with fingers interlaced like lovers should.

Gokudera's ears suddenly felt neglected now that the moist tongue ceased its lapping. It felt cold, but now's not the time to bathe in selfish personal indulgence. Jyuudaime needed his lemon juice, and he's going to get one

Resting his head on Gokudera's shoulder once more, Yamamoto suggested, chuckling like an amused baby, "If you're really that disappointed, I don't mind doing it again."

Gokudera sulked and was busy coming up with an intelligent retort about reading his thoughts when he dominant hand meticulously guided his own. Yamamoto's fingers slid down between the gaps of his fingers, and softly gave it a delicate but skillful squeeze. The juice came running down obediently, some wild streaks racing down their arms.

Gokudera dumped his previous plan aside, and started to contemplate if this was a good idea, on it being a faster way to learn. He examined the technique, not using brute force but rather, the position of the fingers as they squeezed to ensure a- "Ah!" A sudden outburst eluded out of his throat, his spine straightening sharply. "Oi... St-Stop..." His words never did manage to come out this time. "Nn..." His chin lifted up, eyes shutting.

The restless limb that clung onto his taut waist had travelled upwards, trailing about every detail of the torso they memorized, and halted in front of his chest. The nifty fingers found the spot, that wonderfully weak and honest spot on the chest he loved so much, and began its swift and teasing massage.

The small, involuntary twitches on his fingers were overshadowed by the expanding ball of heat particularly in the region between his legs. His breaths grew irregular, caged inside his windpipes. Despite all these, the tormenting finger continued its mission, wiping teasingly in circles around the solid bud, the pressure light but substantial over the old cotton cloth.

"I-Idiot. Th-This is... goddamn... unhygienic..." Gokudera panted, on the verge of being stripped of his ability to construct proper sentences. "Jyuudaime... doesn't need other... juice... damn it."

Another chuckle fanned Gokudera's pores. "Who's the one who taught me to multitask?" Yamamoto pointed out, continuing to exert crushing force on the lemon, until its dried flesh began flaking into the cup.

Gokudera silently cursed at the idiot being such a smartass at the worst of times. He's always wondered if Yamamoto was really a genius in disguise, or in other words, a really devious pervert.

Yamamoto tossed the tortured lemon away, and gave an impatient "now you try." Gokudera bat opened an eyelid, stretching his arm for the bowl of fruit. His almost strengthless hand had just met with the rough skin of the lemon, when sticky, slick skin brushed across his bare flesh underneath the shirt.

Nimble fingers caught the helpless nipple between them, and gave it a soft but sharp pinch. A yelp eluded out of Gokudera, slamming both his elbows onto the tabletop when his knees gave way. As he did he clenched his fist, letting arrows of lemon juice squirt everywhere, staining his shirt, crashing onto his neck. The wet, sleek juice drew a trail along the crook of his neck until they gathered for a brief moment in the hollow of his collarbone, and began their descent down his body again.

Yamamoto's lips ghosted over the bare, porcelain neck. He parted his lustful lips, and slathered his saliva all over the sweet area with his wanton tongue. He licked up all of the drying shadows of the sweet juice on his smooth neck, wondering if lemon were supposed to be sweet, or was it just Gokudera.

Meanwhile, his right hand crawled to where Gokudera's slackened jaws were, and spread the thin layer of juice on his fingers over his full lips, coating the Italian's sensual lips with a film of aroma. And that wasn't without reason, because the next second, Yamamoto, with a quick withdrawal of the hand inside and the agile flip of his waist, had Gokudera's upper body lying on top of the table. Gokudera barely had time to voice out his thoughts, when the taller man came crashing down onto the enticing mouth.

Yamamoto liked the syrup-like feel of the essence on Gokudera's cherry blossom lips. They made soft, almost inaudible popping sounds as Yamamoto planted many butterfly kisses, letting the soft flesh adhere to his mouth, before peeling off with a delightful reluctance induced by the juice. Midway, Yamamoto's wet tongue slid out like a snake hunting for its prey, wiping across their lips, helping to separate them and tasting the sweetness on Gokudera's mouth.

From then on, the kissing escalated to sucking. The swordsman's tongue swiftly brought in the plump lower lip, nibbling lightly on it, suckling gently on it and licking so hungrily. None of them realised that in the heat of the kissing Gokudera was laid onto the kitchen table, head propped against the metallic tap of the sink, being trapped on both sides by Yamamoto's long legs.

Gokudera's hands, as if being pulled by invisible strings, rose, sneaking under Yamamoto's shirt and up along his broad back, spreading minute trails of lemon juice along the pores of the olive skin.

Yamamoto decided to do likewise, peeling the T-shirt to his shoulders and then lapping up the drying prints on collarbone. One of the wild streaks slithered down right to the pink blossom on Gokudera's chest, and Yamamoto gladly circled around the hardened bud, leaving no droplet of juice left, not even in the slit of his delicious, tender flesh.

Gokudera's back arched as he tried to swallow the moan that was forcing its way out. Yamamoto lapped even more delightfully as his chest was raised, giving him more access to the savoury heat. Yamamoto hooked his thumb under the elastic waist band of his lover's sweat pants, and then dragged it along the soft, creamy skin, and then leaving it strapped at where the knees were bent.

Trickles of the sour juice streamed down along the surface of Yamamoto's back and hesitated upon reaching the end of his body, before taking the plunge and splashed on a small scale onto Gokudera's heaving abdomen. The other more erotic streaks collapsed onto Gokudera's erection, the minuscule pressure making the silver-headed boy feel even more unbearable.

"Ah, Gokudera, you've gotten dirty again," Yamamoto said, peering down at the rosy length with impatience. He wet his lips with saliva, sliding down to position himself in front of the coarse, shiny silver hair. Gokudera's hands fell out from beneath his shirt as he did, landing onto his flat stomach instead. The Japanese pulled the fabric of the grey pants down from the right side of the knee. Gokudera bit his bottom lip, eyelids almost shut in the midst of the pleasure while he removed his leg from the hole of the pants, straining his neck to see through slitted windows his rock-hard erection, all red and moistened with gleaming juice of both kinds, and Yamamoto's raven-black spiky hair.

Cold fingers grabbed on firmly to Gokudera's slender waist, as he felt hot breath enshroud his throbbing sacs. Yamamoto kissed the heated skin. He plastered his swollen lips onto the smooth skin, dragging them across the curves of the sacs. Gokudera winced in the gratification, twisting and running his hand through his hair, letting groans be heard among the wet, squishy sucking sounds.

A whine eluded from Gokudera's throat when the narrow tip of Yamamoto's tongue grazed along with his kiss. So Yamamoto lapped up the juices again, so tasty and sweet, cleaning up every area, every inch.

"Oi," Gokudera's cracked voice came in the midst of the soft moaning. "You bastard, what about there..."

Yamamoto simply smirked at him, the honey-brown refelction of his eyes beaming with mischief.

The Italian found his words to be ignored soon when his desperately shaft continued being neglected. Impatience was gnawed at Gokudera as ferociously as the heat was growing in him. "Che..." Gokudera weakly scowled, as his thin lips pressed tight into an awkward line, his white cheeks now bursting with redness. He shut his eyes as his thumb ran over the flesh of the lemon, collecting its juice, before tossing it aside. A creased formed in between his eyebrows as his long fingers wrapped around his length, and began rubbing it, relieving the intolerable itch.

He pumped on it, creating as much friction as he could. The slick sensation of his cum fused with the thin membrane of the juice, rubbing harder and harder, faster and faster, flicking his dirtied thumb over the slit overflowing with white liquid.

"Ah, Goku-nn-dera," Yamamoto called out, alternating between licking and each syllable, "You are as... nn... dirty as you said... nn... I am after-nn-all..."

Gokudera hissed through clenched teeth, "Sh-Shut up. I'm not as dir-dirty as you nn...!"

"Ne, Gokudera... I don't... ahh... think I can take it any... haa... more too..."

With that, Yamamoto ceased his attack and straightened his back, his famished shadow draped over Gokudera's shivering physique, as he slid down his pants just enough to let free his own swollen erection. Gokudera watched as he pressed both their hardened members together, and grinded them hard. Milky white liquid cascaded along the contour of the bulbs, mixing with each other's trails at where skin met skin. Squelching sounds were weaved with breathless pants and gasps.

Yamamoto's trembling knees collapsed as he fell over Gokudera, using his forearm as support to keep him from crashing into the smaller boy. Their faces were very close together, the tips of their noses touching if Yamamoto had not aligned his face a little more to the right. Gokudera glared feebly at him, "You... are despicable..."

Yamamoto smirked, his lips quivering as he did, "No... I am... haa... enjoying..."

"Che," another scowl briefly marred Gokudera's face, as he gathered his remaining drops of strength and crashed his lips into Yamamoto's, locking both of them into another intense battle of the tongues.

Yamamoto's fingers slid from Gokudera's sweaty cheeks downwards, until he dipped into the cum that dripped down along the patch of skin between Gokudera's crotch and ass, until he reached the ring of muscle, contracting and relaxing with each pump of the owner's hand.

Gokudera's hand slammed against the side of the table, when the Japanese's finger slid in and out effortlessly due to the body's secretion. The tip of the finger reached in, feeling about the insides of the hot walls, until his injury-ridden knuckle kissed the rim, and drew out again. Gokudera's legs unwillingly spread out even wider and raised themselves, until they were almost parallel with the table.

Suddenly, Yamamoto stopped everything, the grinding, fingering and kissing. Gokudera breathed heavily for a few more seconds as he heard Yamamoto's clothes shuffle over him. He flipped open an eyelid to peek. He found himself facing Yamamoto's member between his kneeling legs, its liquid dripping onto Gokudera's chin, much to the latter's chagrin.

"H...elp me with that... won't you..." Yamamoto instructed over his shoulder, and bent down, sticking out his tongue. "And I'll help you with... this..."

Thick, powerful tongue muscle penetrated the entrance, swiping around his boiling insides. Gokudera threw his head back, before quickly clutching roughly onto the solid shaft, and slipping it into his mouth.

"Since when did... nn... Gokudera... get so good at.... this...?" Yamamoto mumbled to himself, as he sought not to lose out to his partner either.

Gokudera's free hand found the lemon he threw away earlier. Instinctively he grabbed it, for whatever reason he did not know. Unknowingly he brought the lemon to his chest. He gave it a very mild test. It still seemed full and plump, juicy and contented.

Yamamoto was straying away from the sweet hole and circling around areas of skin where cum is still evident. He was supposed to be cleaning up Gokudera after all. Then, he tasted it; the sour essence mixed with sweat and heat. As he lapped up more and more the sour taste grew stronger, almost as if he was drinking directly from the lemon itself, with a concoction of other wonderful juices.

He then realised that the deep well of the pink hole was dirty again. So he sneaked back in, enjoying the new, mouth-watering taste of the enticing cocktail named Gokudera. He could feel his own erection harden somemore, if that was even possible, in Gokudera's humid mouth; and Gokudera's ebbing ring spasming against his tongue. The sour flavour was beginning to fade away too.

"Come on, Gokudera... Squeeze harder..."

Gokudera twisted the fruit, smashing it into a pulp in a matter of seconds, as he felt the ticklish droplets cascade down the contours of his stomach and down beneath his coarse and unkempt silver hair. Yamamoto, on the other hand, felt Gokudera's walls squeeze his tongue, like a stubborn army trying to trap the invader inside.

"-moto... I think... I'm coming..." As he spoke Yamamoto felt his member being grazed by the sharp, pearly-white teeth. The next second, he had boiling white fluid squirted all over his face, accompanied with the Italian's heavenly moans.

As Gokudera groaned his head raised, until the back of his throat felt something was suffocating inside him. Yamamoto felt the soft vibrations from Gokudera's moans. Then, the shorter boy had thick, gooey fluid wash down his throat, and he swallowed every single drop, until the slit was clean. Yamamoto, too, lapped up every remaining drip of the secretion, albeit still being a bit wobbly.

When they were done, the rain guardian crawled back up to face Gokudera, peering deep into the depth of the emerald green eyes, coated with a sheen of tear. "Let's make... more lemon juice next time...okay?"

Gokudera decided he hates lemons from that day on.

* * *

A/N: Saa! Thanks for reading and I hope you guys like it! No penetration this time, thought I'd give these poor boys a break. But next time... *evil laughter*

Please tell me if this fic went down well with you guys, it's very appreciated!

P.S. A SM fic is also in the works. Please look forward to it!


	3. Skirt

**A/N**: This is a super late fic (two years late can you believe it) for the prompt _VI - 6. Yamamoto/Gokudera: kinky - "You want me to wear a skirt?"_ for _khrfest_. So whoever gave the prompt I'm terribly sorry for being late! And I hope this will pass as an apology for the two-year absence for this series? *puppy eyes*

Please enjoy!

Roles of the Day: Schoolgirl and uh, schoolboy.

* * *

**It's a Friggin' Skirt**

* * *

If only he hadn't gotten drunk. If only he hadn't gotten drunk and opened his bigassed mouth. If only he hadn't gotten drunk and opened his bigassed mouth and retort Lawn Head's _'you ugly duck_' insults by proclaiming that he was so damn hot even _'guys will want to fuck me if I dress up as a bitch!'_.

Now he is stuck wearing a skirt to prove his appeal.

And as if giving that Lawn Head a half-erection wasn't enough -_that bastard, the atrocity!-_-, he had to seduce someone else who was not involved in this stupid gamble. (Ryohei had cunningly roped in Tsuna to make full use of this opportunity.) The stupidest and least likely to get seduced of the lot. That big, hopelessly massive baseball idiot.

"Gokudera? Are you... Gokudera?" The silver-head noticed the corner of one side of Yamamoto's lips faintly jerk up in amusement. "Seriously... Gokudera?"

"Tch," aware that the only other person in the room was peering so hard at him it was as though he had x-ray vision, Gokudera crossed his arms, feigning annoyance for good measure. "What, do you need a DNA test?"

Yamamoto laughed nervously at the not-so-funny joke. "Well, it's just..." _It's just that Gokudera's wearing the girl's uniform and his skirt is so short and showing so much of his legs and it's making Yamamoto feel weird down there_. "...you look different. Did you cut your hair?"

A scowl ripped across Gokudera's face once more. He didn't get it; he had everything planned out meticulously. He sneaked in some erotic magazines under the idiot's desk, he locked the both of them inside an empty classroom, he's wearing a freaking skirt for fuck's sake and letting him eye him like a fucking zoo exhibit. _Get aroused already you twit!_Gokudera imagined himself yelling.

"Are you fucking blind?" He consciously jutted out one side of his hips, mimicking the girls on those late-night television programmes. _Is he looking here? Yes, look here some more. Soon enough, you'll be begging for more._

Yamamoto's gaze lingered at the hemline of the skirt, wondering -and secretly hoping- if it was possible for it to fly up even more. "Er... n-no. Not really," the athlete cleared his throat after realising his voice had cracked a little. "This uh... really suits you."

Well, at least it's all according to plan. Currently, the intelligent boy's brain was filled with ideas on '_how to make some idiot who's been staring at your legs want to stare at your ass_.' Step one, bring attention to your ass.

He gave a snort and turned around, a little too purposely. He killed every cell in his body trying to resist the urge to pull down his skirt when he felt the cloth drifting a bit too far up. Yamamoto could only gape at the long, white legs move in front of each other while the Italian strolled over to the teacher's desk. He looked on when Gokudera turned around once more -Yamamoto's eyes straining, hoping to catch a glimpse of whatever he could catch a glimpse of when the skirt moved- hopped back and pushed himself onto the table. And all the more he looked on when Gokudera smoothly crossed his legs. "Aren't you gonna ask why?"

Gokudera's unusually unagitated voice ripped Yamamoto's gaze away to look at those uneasy, worry-filled eyes. Was that a bland hue of red on his face? "Um, why?" he obeyed, not knowing how else to respond, or even bothering to think of a response for that matter.

No, actually, there were many thoughts running haphazardly in his head._ What happened to Gokudera? Is Gokudera actually a girl? What kind of panties does Gokudera wear?_But obviously the Rain Guardian is someone who treasured his life too much to risk asking these questions.

"Because I need to make you horny."

Well that's frank. "Um, what for?" Not that he cared, because he was just interested in what was in front of him.

"For..." If he's going to tell this goofball of an idiot he got drunk and turned into a slut in all his drunken glory, he would rather suffocate to death by a toilet plunger. "Ugh, there's no need for you to know."

"Anyway," Gokudera started again, eager to get this humiliating thing over and done with. Goddamnit, he felt so like a fucking whore. He slowly raised his fingers to pop the first button of his blouse. He demanded, impatient, "Are you hard yet?" _Because I am starting to feel something, and if you're not, I would very much like to bomb your ass into oblivion._

As much enthusiasm as he had looking at Gokudera, Yamamoto was a little disappointed when he checked his pants. "Nope, nothing," he announced. Maybe this was heaven telling him that it was wrong. He cocked his head up. "Gokudera, I don't think we should do this..."

"Why not?" His fingers were moving to the second button. The idiot's eyes were not on him any more. All of a sudden he felt so unwanted.

"Because my dad told me that I should never do such things before I get married and well, because we're friends and all along I've thought Gokudera was a boy but I didn't know you're a girl an-"

Goddamnit, no way is he going to allow some idiot let his efforts go to fucking waste! "Fuck," he cut him off and leapt off the desk, marching over to the taller teen. He should have known indirect approaches are doomed to fail with idiots; they need outright intervention.

The next thing Yamamoto felt was a violent shove and he toppled over, landing on a chair. Within a split second he found Gokudera sitting on his lap, the Italian's face so dangerously close. "Look, I am going to make you hard and that's that, okay." Intense, jade-green orbs penetrated honey-brown ones.

Without waiting for an answer Gokudera started rocking against Yamamoto's hip. Yamamoto could feel the bomber's bones kneading the muscles on his thighs. _Wow, Gokudera is really skinny._ He unconsciously landed his large palms on both sides of Gokudera's thighs - those smooth, milky thighs -, letting all his little remnants of sense fizzle away.

"Hah..." He could feel Gokudera's warm, moist breath fan over his face. He too, let out a low grunt as he gradually felt the pace of the grinding accentuate.

The younger boy felt something stiffening as Yamamoto's erection awakened. He smirked. Mission accomplished. _But shit, I can't stop._

"Gokudera... so you're really a boy?" Yamamoto gasped more than asked. He too, had felt Gokudera's rock-hard cock with his own. The very thought of it made his member throb even more frantically.

A strengthless head fell onto his broad shoulder, reduced to nothing but pants as the rocking continued. "Of course, idiot." His answer was almost inaudible.

Yamamoto curiously slid one side of Gokudera's blouse off his shoulder, revealing the elegant shoulder frame. Eyes half-lidded with want, he dived down and nibbled the patch of tender flesh, tasting his milk-scented soap with the tip of his tongue. This elicited a not-very-well-concealed moan from the lithe boy.

His hand trailed along his taut calves, brushed past his shaky knees, up his silky smooth thighs and eventually the skirt, which Yamamoto promptly pushed up so he could caress more of the velvety, creamy skin. Finally, it reached the raging hard-on being hidden by the offensive fabric. He broke apart from the biting, and asked the boy who was clenching his fist so tightly on his shirt, "Gokudera, can I?"

The only response he got was a strained nod. Smacking his lips, he carefully lifted the skirt, only to discover yet another layer of fabric to uncover. Deciding that this was going to be rather inefficient, he hauled Gokudera up and laid him on a nearby desk. The Italian started to protest, "wait, not thi- nn!"

His breath hitched as the swordsman scraped the tip of his teeth with the mound under the wet fabric. He closed his lips around the head, brushing the flat of his tongue across every area within his reach. The tip of his tongue travelled from the slit leaking with pre-cum, down across the bulb, and up and down and everywhere along the shaft. Gokudera's fingers sank into the soft spiky black hair, as he felt his legs spread wider apart. Fuck he hated this, feeling so vulnerable and so fucking like a whore.

Then the teasing ceased. Yamamoto caught the elastic band at the side of the cock and tugged it aside, resting it against the contours of the dick itself. He gulped. Gokudera just looked so erotic with his skirt flipped over and letting him see his furiously red cock which contrasted so sharply with the rest of his porcelain skin. Gokudera just cringed even more at the cool air hitting the sensitive flesh.

Reaching for his zippers, the taller teen said, "Gokudera, I can't take it any more." He unzipped and released his own pulsating member, feeling a little coy to let Gokudera see this.

He leaned forward, wrapping his fingers around both Gokudera's and his cocks, and pressed them together, closing every inch of space between them. He moved his hips again, drawing out cracked moans and grunts from both boys. Nimble fingers did not forget to desperately rub the burning shafts. His thumb, meanwhile, hovered over the madly leaking heads and stroked fiercely.

"Haa... I'm feeling... I'm... I'm comin- Ahh...!" Gokudera's words turned incomprehensible as soon as his breath got caught inside his throat. Bright flashes hit him as he flipped his head back. White liquid spilled and stained the damned skirt.

Remembering that the idiot had yet to come, Gokudera got caught between leaving him alone or helping him. Eventually he picked the latter, just so he could add salt to the wound. With shaky arms, he crawled over to Yamamoto. He clumsily caught hold of his cock -_holy shit this guy's a monster_- and slid up and down and up and down and up and down. "Ah Goku-..." _Shit how the hell can an idiot get so wet?_ "Haa... Nngh...!"_ In any case, let's just hope he's going to be done very quickly so- _

"Ah no I'm co-"

Hot juice splattered onto his face.

[-]

From then on, Gokudera vowed to not speak to Yamamoto ever again until he learns to warn others beforehand, and taught himself to never take Ryohei's dares seriously.

* * *

**A/N**: Thank you for reading and if it made your day any less boring, I'm really happy! (:


	4. Phonesex

**A/N:** What am I doing, I don't even know anymore. I am really sorry I have let this series rot. It's not even remotely related to kinky costume sex anymore, just pure kinky and pure pron. I just hope that in my one year of inactivity I can continue to keep up to your standards.

Serious things aside, today, I bring you phone sex! But I must confess, I have absolutely no idea how it works. I'm not even sure if this is called phone sex. But nevertheless, I hope it is still yaoi-fangirl-fantasy-material so I hope you enjoy it!

Roles of the Day: Um, Caller and Advisor?  
_(I don't even.)_

* * *

**Idiots Give the Worst Remedies  
**  
_(Aaaand I give the worst titles.)_

* * *

Gokudera sat cross-legged on his bed, glaring menacingly at his crotch.

A few moments prior Gokudera had noticed a bulge underneath his fabric boxers. He checked and he discovered that his penis was... erect. He quickly snapped his elastic band back into its place and slightly panicked. Gokudera was not the kind who panics easily, and there he was having a mini trepidation over the state of his manhood.

It was as if his penis was possessed and it was rather creepy.

...yeah right, as if you can get a fucking penis possessed. Gokudera went back to speculating about its existence.

Was it a kind of disease? Like boils or chicken pox... except at the nether regions? But he hadn't remembered coming across such weird symptoms while reading up on medical disorders. And of all times, his internet was down, so it was impossible to scour the net for information. This ignorance made him even madder.

So he decided that staring at it angrily will scare it into submission and make his penis return to its normal state. It seemed to be working, he was started to lose the heat that flushed his body when the... _symptom_ revealed itself. The only setback was that it was taking far too much of a mental toll on him, even on the famed Right Hand Man of the Vongola who never loses his focus.

But patience was never a virtue of his. With raised eyebrows, he carefully lifted his waistband to check again. The monster stared right back at him with equal intensity as before and Gokudera thought he heard a growl, so he quickly let go of the elastic band.

_'Okay Hayato. Don't panic. Think. I'm sure you've seen this somewhere before.'_ Gokudera closed his eyes as he reeled to remember all the instances he could recall. He had seen this strange occurrence before, he was as certain as Lussuria's sexual orientation.

_A bulge in his pants. 'I'll be... heading to the washroom for a while.' The flustered voice came back to him. _Whose voice is it?_ 'Ahahaha...'_

How could he forget. That laughter. That idiotic laughter.

The said idiot's face was projected in his mind. And as though his stupidity itself was a disease, the mere thought made the Monster throb.

After a heated internal debate, Gokudera hesitantly punched in the numbers into his cellphone. He put his phone reluctantly to his ear, and heard the dial tone played. On the second tone Gokudera was on the verge of giving up when he heard a button being pressed.

"Hello? Gokudera?"

_How does he know it's me?_ The silver-haired thought angrily, and the Monster throbbed to remind him of his existence.

Oh yeah, caller ID.

"L-Listen, I don't usually do this, and it's just this once so don't ever expect anything like this ever from me agai-"

A chuckle interrupted his rant. "What do you need help with?"

The Storm Guardian gulped and toyed with the idea of flipping his phone shut. But the thing is not going to go away, so he might as well face it like a man.

"I uh... Something's up..."

"What thing?" Concern was apparent over the phone. "Should I come over?"

"No!" Gokudera exclaimed. Having Yamamoto in the room was the last thing he needed right now. Well, one of them anyway, there was a lot of things he didn't need in the room right now. But he digress.

"...penis."

There was a brief second of inactivity at the other side of the phone. "Wha-?"

"Penis." Gokudera stated it, loud and clear.

He could practically see Yamamoto's startled expression at the other side of Namimori. "I-I'm not sure that is how you use the word in a sentence, Gokudera... if that was even a sentence..."

"Oh for fuck's sake..." Gokudera involuntarily rolled his eyes and half-shouted into the device, "My penis. Something's up with it." He paused. "My penis is up." This _is_ the idiot we're talking about, he needs to make it more explicit.

The silence lasted a mere 3 seconds but to the distressed boy it was 3 whole decades. Maybe he should just hang up the phone and-

"Okay... and you don't know what it is?"

Unwillingly, Gokudera admitted. "Yes."

An awkward chuckle, followed by an even more awkward reply, "Um, this hasn't happened to you before? You-You really don't know what it is?"

"Are you an idiot or what? Why the fuck then am I calling you for?"

"Okay! Okay! Chill!" Yamamoto made a clumsy laughter. "Um, th-this is called an e-erection. When this happens, you- _people,_ m-masturbate to make it go back to normal." The swordsman said softly. Gokudera thought he heard the sound of the locking of a door over the phone.

A puzzled expression formed. "Are you speaking Greek. What is masturbating?"

"Y-You uh, relieve all the pressure that was building up down there."

"Can you talk some sense damn it? Cut straight to the chase and tell me how do you relieve these goddamn pressure you're talking about!"

There was a slight shriek on the Japanese boy's part. "You want me to give you instructions on h-how to m-m-masturbate?"

Admittedly, it was quite fun hearing the usually jovial teen stammer. "Yes, now hurry the fuck up."

"Okay..." Gokudera heard Yamamoto swallow his saliva. "First, you touch it."

"My dick?"

"...yes, your d-dick."

"Do I need to do it directly, or I can just do it over my pants?"

"It would be better if you do it directly. A-and if you don't want to make a mess of your clothes. Ahhaha..."

Gokudera licked his lips as he moved his free hand to pull his waistband over the Monster. It looked fiercer than ever, with an angry scarlet flush to complete the look. He poked it with his finger tip, and felt a slight tingle through his body.

"Okay I poked it, what now?"

"Ahhaha... Maybe I need to give you clearer instructions... By touch I mean you're supposed to um, h-hold it in your hands."

The Italian was not so sure about gripping something so revolting in his hands, but he followed instructions anyway. The moment the heat of his palm enveloped the throbbing member, another spark of electricity shot through his legs. Gokudera winced a little, noticing the little bead of white liquid that emerged at the tip.

"Knh..." he silently hissed.

"I suppose you're feeling g-good right now huh?" Yamamoto muttered to himself, before saying in clearer diction, "Now you m-move your hands up and down, c-continuously."

Gokudera did as he was told and slid his hand in a regular motion along the length of the stiff penis. The feelings that hit him were a sensation he had never felt before. It was quite addictive.

"D-Do you feel anything?"

"Yeah, it feels... weird. Ticklish, but in a good way." He could feel the strength of his voice slowly weakening.

"Th-This is called m-masturbating, Gokudera. If you keep doing it and feeling good, you eventually get rid of the um, problem."

Sounds easy enough. Up, down, up, down, up, down. Repeat, repeat, repeat.

"It's starting to feel sore," Gokudera voiced, feeling the effect of the friction on his delicate skin. "But it's also going down. This is how it goes down right?"

"N-No!"

Gokudera raised an eyebrow, wondering how he was so flustered over that.

"I-uh... This is not how masturbating works..." Yamamoto said, embarrassed, in an attempt to justify his outcry. "Your erection is supposed to go away uh... with an explosion."

"An explosion?"

"Metaphorically!" Yamamoto gave another awkward laugh. "By that I mean you're supposed to feel super duper good when it is going back to normal." There was a sheepish smile.

It was starting to be a challenge to the swordsman. Being a habitual practitioner of such activities is one thing, teaching others verbally is another. Especially when the other party is the object of your fantasies.

"I've lost that feeling, Yamamoto." Gokudera informed. "I keep rubbing my dick but the feeling's just not coming back."

Having Gokudera call his regular name was the force that finally brought his own swollen member upright. As much as Yamamoto hated to, he'd have to end the phone call soon. He got off from the edge of the mattress and sat beside it instead, learning against its side.

"'K-Kay. What arouses you?"

"Dynamites."

"Haha... Not in that sense! Um, what... or who were you thinking of before your p-penis became erect?" Yamamoto silently crossed his fingers, even though he knew the odds were microscopically slim.

Gokudera hesitated. No fucking way was he ever going to tell the baseball idiot he was actually thinking of him. He would rather drown himself in a pool of sanitizers than admit that. So he stayed quiet.

"It's fine if you don't want to tell me, haha..." there was a little tint of disappointment in the Japanese teen. "B-But I want you to think about the person now, laying underneath you." Let's see if he could remember his previous fantasies about girls.

"She's n-naked, and you're kissing her." It kind of hurt to imagine Gokudera kissing another girl, or another person who wasn't him, for that matter. "You-You're kissing her passionatel-"

"It's a guy."

"Wha-?"

"The person whom I thought about was a guy." Gokudera repeated himself. "Now change your scenario because it's hard to imagine myself kissing girls."

Maybe there is still hope. Something lit up in Yamamoto. He corrected himself, "O-Okay. You're underneath that person, and he's kissing you passionately, a-and you press your tongue against his-" Unknowingly he had already had his own fingers wrapped around his own member.

"What? Must it involve kissing? Kissing girls are bad enough and you're making me kiss guys?"

"I'm sorry Gokudera, but this is how masturbating works..." Yamamoto had offered himself to Lust and it made him bolder.

And surprisingly enough it worked. "...Fine" came the response from the other side.

Yamamoto continued, "He runs his hands along your silky smooth thighs, and his tongue trails down along your jawline, your collarbone, and then your chest."

As the other party narrated Gokudera felt his penis start to harden again. When did he get so good at narrating anyway?

"He bends down and licks your n-nipple," over the phone he heard Yamamoto's voice shiver. "He fiddles with it and circles it and pinches it and nibbles on it."

Gokudera suddenly felt his own nipples grew sensitive. They were itching to be touched. The Italian grunted and slammed the loudspeaker button, dumping his cellphone onto the mattress as his hand reached under his shirt.

"A-Are you _-ah...-_ doing o-okay, Goku-Gokudera?" the static voice sounded.

"Yeah." It came out as a whimper unintentionally. So he corrected himself with a more stable "yeah".

"I-It's not good to keep it down."

"Just hurry up damn it." It took Hurricane Bomb every ounce of his remaining strength to make the sentence sound normal.

"When he's done he _-nn-_ spreads your leg and lowers his face to where your -_ah...-_ flushing red erection is." Occasional gasps started to slip into Yamamoto's sentences.

As if being controlled by the description, Gokudera stripped his boxers off so he had the liberty to open his legs far apart. Something creamy and slimy lubricated his heated shaft. He could feel some of it spill over and cascade down the skin of the rosy sacs below.

_"Hn-"_

Hearing Gokudera's hitched exclamation of pleasure tensed Yamamoto's muscle even more. It was getting harder to maintain this balancing act.

"I open my mouth and rolled my tongue over... and over the tip of your d-dick. Th-Then it goes inside my mouth and I lick every single bit of your shaft." He didn't even realise he started putting himself in the picture.

And it seems that Gokudera didn't mind either. His eyes were shut tight, breathless pants escape him. His hands moved faster and faster.

"My other hand massages your-your hole. -_Ha...-_ I st-stuck a finger inside, followed by another... _Nn-!_"

Gokudera couldn't care less about the saliva that greased his open mouth. He removed his hand from his chest and shifted downwards, locating the rim of muscle Yamamoto was talking about. He made contact.

Wha-What was he doing? He felt so... dirty, like an animal who was acting purely on instincts. He was touching his fucking asshole, damn it. B-But it feels... it feels so good. Just-Just this once...?

Only the tip of his fingertip made it past. His muscles were clenched so tight he could only resort to wriggling it. And even wrigglng itself was enough to send waves of gratification across his body.

_"Nn..."_

"I moved my fingers in and out and in and out and in and... -_ah...-_ and I spread it apart."

Yamamoto himself was at his limits. Just voicing out his fantasies was enough to send him over he edge; listening to Gokudera's erotic voice -something he had never dreamed of hearing- and just thinking about Gokudera masturbating to that was making his nervous system go crazy. He didn't care if his hands were dirty now.

"Th-Then I take away my hands, and... positioned m-my d-dick there... -_ha...-_ instead." He's really done it this time. His voice was being reduced to mere pants.

Another badly-concealed grunt elicited from Gokudera. He managed to stick half his finger in this time, with help from the wet fluid. The thought of seeing Yamamto's member, and being the only one who was allowed to see, made his erection pulsate with greater fervour than before.

"_Ha..._ push in... all... the way in... and-and... move out..." His throat was getting dry, he's not sure if he could keep this up any longer. "...and th-thrust... again and again and again..." He was losing his strength in even holding his phone, as he continued applying friction to his penis.

Gokudera's hand movements grew more rapid and needy. He bit down on his teeth hard, spit smearing the sides of his lips. He was breathing heavily. His back arched, lifting his hip up. Something was growing inside him. Just a little bit more...

"_Ngh...!"_

"P-Pound into... Gokudera... call... -_ngh...-_ name..."

"Ya-Yama...!" He hissed just as something burst inside him. He saw flashes of white, a sense of immense pleasure washed over his nerves. A gasp escaped his throat, his chest stuck up and head thrown back. White liquid squirted onto his stomach, thighs and bedsheets.

Hearing the sound of Gokudera as he came was more than tantalizing. Having done his job, he tossed the phone away, panting breathlessly, "Gokudera..." His free hand clutched at wooden floor.

Finally with a few more pumps of his hand he too, came, dirtying his pants and floor in the process. He rested his head on the mattress, exhausted. When he recovered just enough strength to reach for his phone, the call was already ended.

* * *

Yamamoto's phone vibrated vigorously, early in the morning. Groggily his hands shot out from under the bedsheets and felt around the table for his phone. Without looking at it he flipped it open and put it to his ear. "Hello...?" His voice was muffled.

"You fucking idiot-!" A line of more vulgarities followed, which was when Yamamoto wisely put his phone far from his eardrums.

And a very good morning to you too.

When he decided that the other party was done he replied normally again, "Gokudera? Need help again?" He rubbed his eyes as he sat up, secretly smirking at the last time he offered his help.

"Help? If that's one thing I gained from asking help from you is to learn to _never_ ask you for help again!" The person yelled.

"That's kind of harsh, Gokudera. What happened?"

"What happened? After you gave me that... that _remedy_ to this stupid erection disease it just kept coming back! For the past 2 days my fucking dick has been up and the more I tried to make it go away using your method the more it comes back! I think I touched it so much I'm ths close to getting fucking blisters! Your stupid cure made it worse! You'd better have a way to solve it or I'll-"

Little did Gokudera know his little rant went unheard, because Yamamoto was already on the way to his apartment.

* * *

**A/N:** Thank you for reading till the end! I hope you've uh, enjoyed it!

I hope it wasn't too painful to read, because I do understand that it is very wordy and I'm not a very succinct person myself. Please feel free to tell me, if it is, I'll format it in a way such that it is easier to read.

And finally, thank you very much! Now off you go, and jam Yamamoto's phone with fangirl calls.


	5. Handcuffs and Toys

A/N: Woah, 3 fanfics in 2 days. Just 1 day before a major exam? My life is over.

Anyways, I bring you the first non 8059 chapter in this series! D18! Yeah, the whip and handcuffs part are finally starting to get to me (how horribly late, I know.)

Just a few warning: this chapter will contain a lot of tools used, and is briefly non-con. Anyone who gets disturbed by such things, (for I traumatized my ownself too), I would advise you to not read this chapter.

(But don't worry, I did list this series as humor didn't I? Nothing bad will happen... eventually.)

Fine fine I'll shut up and present you the porn already.

Roles of the Day: Um, Whipper and Person-Being-Handcuffed-to-a-Chair...?

* * *

**It's a Foreigner's Thing**

* * *

The crack of a whip and the swipe of a tonfa later, the two men finally came face to face with each other.

"We'll call it a day now," the blonde, wet with perspiration, declared. "I think you're good enough to move on to the next stage of training now."

The other boy, equally drenched in perspiration, wiped his lower jaw with his sleeve.

"Great job, Kyoya. This calls for a celebration!" The Cavallone said.

Hibari raised a not-too-amused eyebrow at Dino and without waiting for an answer, turned around and left the rooftop.

His legs were wobbly as he stumbled, after having fought without taking any breaks the entire afternoon. A few steps later, he collapsed.

* * *

Consciousness drifted in. Finally he collected enough awareness to force his eyelids open. His vision blurred into clarity, and revealed that he was in a small and dark room, something like a gym but with a much grimmer overtone.

…where was he? He flexed his biceps and pushed himself up, only to be pulled back by something pinching at his wrists and ankles. He fell back into what he seemed to be sitting on - a hard, metallic chair and noticed that it was unusually cold where his body made contact with the material.

He looked down to see that he had been stripped of his clothing. His wrists felt like they had been handcuffed behind the chair (and they were, after he tested it out) and his ankles to either arms of the chair, forcing him into a squatting position.

Hibari's frown deepened with annoyance. Who dares do this to him? Who dares kidnap Hibari Kyoya? Who _dares_?

He was about to sound out his thoughts when a voice cut in. "So you've awakened." It was a familiar voice, but made to sound a lot deeper than he could recognize.

"Name yourself," Hibari demanded.

There was a chuckle. (That herbivore dared chuckle in front of him?) The voice spoke again, "You'll know later, just concentrate on the fun for now, okay?"

Before Hibari could respond a strip of black cloth was flung over his eyes and blocked out his sight. He could no longer see, but he was skilled enough to be able to rely on his other senses.

"I am not amused at all, herbivore. I would advise you to stop this before I decide to bite you to death in a more brutal way than I already plan to," he threatened with cold, chilly words. "Release me now...!"

Hibari was halfway through his speech when a sensitive part of his chest, his nipples to be exact, felt something light and feathery tickle it. An odd sensation shot through his veins, he wasn't a ticklish person but it felt really weird to him.

"Oh, they got hard." The perpetrator commented, his breath hot on Hibari's chest. "Are you finally feeling something from my whip?"

Hibari grunted and before he could reply his other nipple felt a thumb and index finger pinch it. Hibari willed himself to put up a poker face. The daring fingers pinched, twisted, rubbed and even pulled the solid bud… It was still an odd feeling; Hibari couldn't quite put a name to it. But he definitely felt anger build up inside him.

The atrocitiy to even try humiliate Hibari Kyouya! This herbivore will be guaranteed a slow and painful death.

"Stop it this instance," he ordered, serious intent obvious in his words.

The stranger replied, "Hm? But your little guy is beginning to show some reaction."

Indeed, Hibari's organ was half stiff, his sacs and a little bit of the bottom of the shaft a slight ruby flush. It continued rising on its own, slowly, bit by bit.

Hibari snarled, making his rage apparent. He then felt something sharp sink into his neck. Another weird sensation zapped through his body. That herbivore had the guts to actually try to bite him? His death wish shall be granted, whether he liked it or not.

The perpetrator nibbled on the soft patch of flesh connecting his neck and shoulder nevertheless. The leader of the student council smelt like the generic brand of soap, but it was a pleasant smell nevertheless.

The man's tongue lapped at the heated skin. He alternated between bites, licks and smooches as he travelled south, tasting his muscles and battle scars along his chest. He sucked on the boy's nipple with his lips, flicked the solid bud with his tongue, and sometimes nibbled it gently. When he's had his fill, the man travelled down to fourteen-year-old's toned abdomen. All the while, Hibari was struggling to break out of his constrains.

"Ooh, the little guy's fully up now." The man finally stopped.

"I'll bite you to death. You'd wish you hadn't been born," Hibari spat, fully enraged at the maliciousness of such acts performed on him.

The other man seemed to have ignored his death threats, because Hibari heard the sound of some electric whirring, like that of an electronic shaver.

Then, something vibrating vigorously made contact with the tip of his penis. Hibari's entire body tensed, a silent breath escaped his throat at the pleasurable feeling. Yes it was pleasurable, but he hated to admit it.

By then the vibrating tool was down along his length, tickling, exciting the organ, and then back up and circled round the furiously red tip again.

Hibari was putting all the strength he could muster into preventing him from showing signs that he was enjoying it. "Knh…!" But the more he tried, the more gratifying the sensation grew.

He thought he heard a snigger from the kidnapper, and the next second the device had left his fluid-coated shaft and moved down past the sensitive but equally wet patch of skin. By then the whirring sound had ceased and so did the vibrations. But the gratification that continue pummeling his senses wasn't compromised.

The next thing he felt was something circling his rim of muscles of a secret part of his body nobody should ever see. Hibari threw his legs up, but the cuffs on his ankles sliced into his flesh and were flung back down. He hissed some more, toes opening and curling in reflex.

"…fucking… kill…" His words were incoherent.

The motion stopped. He thought he felt the tip of this device barely kissing the entrance to his body. Finally regaining some sense of logic, Hibari panted, "Don't you fucking dare." Acidity laced his words. He really resembled a predator now, with his sharp fangs bared in hostility and the corner of his mouth dripping with spit.

But the thing pushed past the pink muscles and inside him anyway. Hibari was taken by surprise and couldn't control the gasp that escaped him. He arched his body, limbs tensing desperately to be released from their restrains. His jaw slackened and hung open, powerless.

The foreign object began sliding in and out, in and out of him. This continued for some time, accompanied with squelching sounds. The man who was responsible for this was also half-breathless, having scrutinized the way his beautiful captive's rim of muscle alternate between stretching and clenching as the bulb forced its way in and out. When he pulled out new strands of white fluid got stuck to the plastic tool. He was very glad that Hibari was obviously enjoying this.

"Why are you trying to fight it? Why are you denying yourself of the pleasure? You deserve to enjoy things, Kyoya."

The mention of his name hammered some sense of rationality back into the boy's mind. "This voice… Cava-…!"

He was interrupted by a long, large thing forcing itself all the way up and into his insides.

"Hm? Were you saying something Kyouya?"

Hibari was too overwhelmed to speak. His head laid back on the top of the chair, out of breath and panting heavily. His chest heaved up and down, laced with beads of perspiration.

Dino smiled. "Never mind then." He flipped the switch of the vibrator on.

"Ugh…!" Hibari's attempt to stifle his cries resulted in a hoarse whimper. _The thing… It's moving…! This damn thing is moving in circles inside me…! That fucking Cavallone. That fucking herbivore, how dare he!_

"I'll kill you, Cavallone. I'll fucking kill you. I swear," was all he had enough energy for to say. But the toxic that dripped from his words was no less lethal.

Something soft attacked his lips. Dino had covered Hibari's mouth with his own, his tongue stroking and exploring the inside of the drool-coated cavern. _Bite it, bite his fucking tongue off_, the skylark told himself. But he found it highly displeasing that he was too lethargic to even move his jaw. He did have strength to move his tongue, however, and relished the Cavallone's inside. He tasted… not bad, for a herbivore.

Dino broke off. The vibrator stopped sliding, although it continued quivering and moving around in circles. Hibari hissed when he realized that Dino had left it inside him and for his own muscles to clench in. No matter how he tried his rim muscles wouldn't slacken either. Every time he tried to relax, the vibrator would tickle at a new spot in his walls again and he would tighten in response. His physical reactions made him weak, and he disliked it.

His throbbing member then felt something wet encase his bulb and a thick, slick muscle slosh at it skillfully. By then his penis was pulsating so hard his body felt like it was burning, as if he was set on fire. Hibari's heavy breaths grew louder, to the point that merely breathing through his nostrils would be useless.

Dino's lips slid up and down along the shaft, his tongue accompanying it by licking up the aftermath of saliva he left on the burning skin. On the places he couldn't reach with his mouth, he wrapped his heated palm over it, pumping in time to each bob of his head.

Something was threatening to burst inside Hibari. He didn't know what this feeling was, but he couldn't deny that it felt good any longer. His cries were mixed in with his gasps as an intensely gratifying sensation exploded inside him. His member pulsated as it released substances into Dino's mouth.

No he didn't care if it was a rude thing to do. Heck it felt like he was pissing into his mouth, and revenge was sweet. That fucking Cavallone doesn't deserve to be treated politely.

He was barely catching his breath when Dino cut him off with a kiss again. This time his mouth was even wetter and stickier than just now, and honestly, it stank. Hibari finally realized that Dino had made him taste the substance he forced down Dino's throat. Had Hibari not been so zapped of energy now, he would have broke out of the damn chair and pummel the Italian's face to pulp with his tonfa. He was shaking with rage.

Dino finally pulled back, their moistened lips connected by and dripping with the sticky white fluid. He reached over and undid the blind cloth, allowing Hibari to see for the first time since all this atrocity started.

Hibari let out a deep growl, almost akin to that of a very angered carnivore. His eyes shone with fury. But Dino also spotted the sheen of moisture coating his eyes, a tiny pearl threatening to fall down any moment. It clawed at Dino's heart, and he wiped away the dirty liquid caking his jaws, and put a light but loving kiss on the corner of his eye. "Sorry, Kyoya, if I scared you," he apologized.

The rage monster growing inside of Hibari seemed to have shrunk a bit when he heard the apology. Rationality began to take over his emotions now.

Sensing that his trainee had calmed down a little, Dino retreated, looking down at the sky lark. He smiled, glad that Hibari's anger had been controlled somewhat.

That's when Hibari saw that Dino had not been clothed as well. Despite a lack of light, there was just enough for him to make out the highlights and shadows of his toned muscles and scars – way more than he had, some of them caused by his own whip – … and the Italian's very big and very red appendage.

Discovering that he had been staring at his tutor's length stirred his senses alive again. He looked down and saw to his dismay that his own member was upright again. He hissed in annoyance.

Dino simply chuckled, finding Hibari's antics helplessly adorable. Then he regained his composure, leaning in to the boy's face. Hibari saw in his eyes a shade of lust and wanton, being uselessly held back by sensibility. His voice was low and husky, "I'm going to go in now."

Hibari protested, throwing more intimidating death threats at him but the full, thick length went inside him anyway. It took a while but once Dino's penis was entirely inside him Hibari's grunts ended, him being reduced to mere heavy pants again. His walls were throbbing as they tried to get used to the size. It was much bigger and touched deeper spots than the vibrator did – and it felt ten times better.

"I'm going to start moving. I'll promise I'll make you feel good, okay Kyoya?"

Dino started thrusting. His pumps started out slow and gentle, before gradually accentuating to something fast and needy. None of them spoke, they only heard their breathless gasps, '_squelch, squelch, squelch' _and the sound of flesh hitting flesh.

In the midst of rocking their hips together, Dino reached to release Hibari's wrists from the handcuffs. A rational Hibari would have told him that this was the chance for him to exact his revenge, but a passion-driven Hibari simply wrapped his arms around the Cavallone and dug his nails into his back, pulling him in closer. In an attempt to hide his gasps, however, the boy bit down hard on Dino's shoulder. But Dino didn't mind. That was probably the boy's way of expressing his emotions.

Hibari came once more, spilling the milky white fluid over both their stomachs. Dino came next, barely pulling out in time. The pulsating wet hole leaked with the sticky liquid.

Dino slumped back onto the floor, catching his breath as he struggled to prop himself up to look at Hibari. Once Hibari regained some ounces of strength, the first thing he told the blonde lying on the ground was "I will… still fucking bite you to dea-"

He blacked out.

When he was awake again he found himself lying on a comfortable mattress, covered with a thick blanket. He sat up, head pounding painfully. Contrary to what he thought he remembered, he was dressed again, in smooth silk pyjamas. Next to him laid a blonde man, who had been watching him intently – perhaps unsettlingly – all these while.

"Good morning, Kyoya~" Dino chirped. "Have you had enough rest?"

Hibari snarled. "You dare mention the atrocity."

Dino pouted. "Don't put it like that, I was trying to make you feel good."

"That was unnecessary. And I will still bite you to death. In a very inhumane way."

Dino grinned sheepishly, perhaps a little afraid of the sky lark. He swung his arms around his trainee's waist, burying his face into his stomach. "But you deserve to feel good. You've been trying so hard, it feels wrong to not reward you or something. You deserve a lot more than you credit yourself for, Kyoya. Treat yourself nicely once in a while."

Dino then heaved himself up and planted a light kiss on the boy's lips. "Oh by the way, in case you haven't heard, I like you Kyoya, very much," he said, and leant back in for the gentle kiss once more, smiling.

Hibari didn't retaliate this time, and he was pretty sure he was in his rational mind too. He... sort of liked this too.

When they pulled away it was Hibari broke the silence first.

"Is this… what people in your country do?" He asked without a sense of embarrassment, his emotionless expression in place.

Dino only laughed coyly and scratched his head, unsure of how to answer.

* * *

Meanwhile, on the other side of Namimori…

"Brace yourself for punishment, my foolish minion!" The crack of a whip sounded.

The said minion was blindfolded and chained to the frame of the bed. "Ahhaha this is so exciting, Gokudera!" Yamamoto laughed gleefully.

Gokudera gritted his teeth in embarrassment. "Sh-shut up and let me top you properly!"

* * *

**A/N:** Fine, I lied. I couldn't help it, 8059 is too dominant in my fangirl mind right now. Hope you enjoyed the little omake!

Thank you for reading this! I hope it's not too senseless (who am I kidding). And I don't have much experience with writing Hibari and Dino, so it would be greatly appreciated if you could give me tips on their personality and stuff. At least, I hope I did a fairly decent job of their characterization?

Reviews are another thing that are appreciated. :3 Thank you for taking your time to read this! Until next time!


	6. Neko

**A/N**: Nyan nya nya nya, nya nya nyanyanya nya nya. _/nya-agh!_ Nya nya nya nya, nya nya nyanyanya! Nyan nyan nyanyan. Nyan nya nya, Nyannyan Nyan! /l_arge, kitty eyes_

(Translation: Finally, neko theme! It's long overdue, but I finally found the inspiration for a neko smut, after like, 2 years. _/bricks self_It's utter nonsense, the only plot in this story doesn't even make sense, but who am I kidding. You know why you're here. Here's your fresh serving of 8059 smut, Honourary Perverts!

Hope you guys like it!)

Roles of the day: Nekojin and Owner

* * *

**Kids These Days Are Such Horny Creatures**

* * *

The calloused hand pumped furiously up and down along the slick shaft, fingers moving habitually to the sensual spots they know best. Yamamoto spread his legs further apart, feeling his member grow more sensitive. His back rested against the side of his bed, head lying on the mattress. His jaw slackened as he leant his head back further. Being alone in the room gave him the liberty to be as loud as he wished. The winter air turned Yamamoto's gasps into mist.

He came. White liquid squirted and stained the floor, his hand and his clothes. Yamamoto laid there for a moment, catching his breath. Alright, the old man will be back any moment, so let's get cleaned up-

"Nyan."

Yamamoto's head shot up in surprise. His face burnt even redder when he noticed the presence of the creature.

A well-groomed cat stood just a few centimeters away, waving its paw in its face like the beckoning cat mascots in shop entrances. It appeared that there were sticky fluids strung across its delicate silver fur.

Yamamoto had completely forgotten about the cat. Tsuna was on a holiday trip with his mother and was unable to look after his pet, so Yamamoto was tasked with the honourable duty of taking care of it until he returns. Which was just one day ago, and the absent-minded athlete had already forgot about its existence.

What was its name again? _Shiro?_ That's a dog's name. _Sadaharu?_That's an overgrown dog's name._ Bubuchacha? _That's the name of the dog-car hybrid the kid down the street owns.

Ah yes,_ Gokudera_. Yamamoto wondered how Tsuna couldn't have gotten a more normal name like Kitty, but thought that it could've been the name of the cat's previous owner, because Tsuna mentioned it was adopted.

In the midst of his useless ramblings, an annoyed Gokudera stuck out its dainty tongue to clean its fur of the disgusting mess. It was obviously a cat with OCD.

"Ah! Don't lick that!" Yamamoto jumped at the cat. Gokudera leapt up out of reflex, but Yamamoto was quick enough to catch it in midair.

Gokudera struggled, clawing at Yamamoto's firm grip. "Relax, I'm just gonna clean you up," Yamamoto said in a reassuring voice.

He sat back down in his original position and clasped the uncooperative cat gently between his thighs. That should keep it in place. He stretched over to the bedside desk and reached for tissues.

Meanwhile, Gokudera noticed something peculiar. It was a weird-looking toy, in between the legs of its new owner. Gokudera gave the long, limp toy a poke with its small paw.

Yamamoto flinched, letting go of the cat in the process. Gokudera dropped onto the wooden floor with a soft thud, but immediately flipped back to its feet.

"Gokudera," Yamamoto scolded.

The wilful cat ignored him and took a defensive stance, crouching low and death-glaring at the weird toy with all its might, its tail waving deliberately, as if deciding on a course of attack.

Yamamoto finally realised the situation, and gave himself a really awkward laugh. "It's… It's okay. This, um, _thing_ won't hurt you." He gave a quick scan around his room to see where he had thrown his pants to.

Gokudera seemed to understand Yamamoto's words. It eased its muscles, and straightened its ears. It approached the enemy cautiously. It gave a careful poke to the toy again. Yamamoto winced, either out of fear of Gokudera extending its claws or out of that tiny jolt of pleasure from the touch, which startled the cat with his sudden movement. The athlete relaxed, and gave the feline some time to assess his penis.

Yamamoto also took this time to assess his life. _Why am I showing my penis to a cat?_

Before he could consider anything else, Gokudera was already in between his thighs, approaching his member. Yamamoto didn't even have the time to register when Gokudera swiped its tiny tongue across the shaft.

The teenager shuddered, feeling an odd sense of pleasure race up his torso and into his head. Gokudera thought it tasted funny, and continued licking, because it's cat logic to lick funny-tasting things. At least, this heat helped with the chilly weather.

Ever the inquisitive feline, Gokudera tasted every part of the toy, wiping its tongue across the delicate skin. It seemed that something magical must be happening, because the more it licked, the bigger this toy grew. It roused its curiousity even more.

The sandpaper surface of the tongue was a different sensation from his rough palms, and the short, quick licks offered a new experience from the usual long strokes he gives himself. Yamamoto breathed heavily, careful not to make any noise that will startle the cat.

Really, why on earth is he receiving a blowjob from a cat? And enjoying it?

Gokudera seemed to be done with the length, and its interest moved on to the head of his penis. It looked so… appetizing. Gokudera opened his mouth wide, ready to sink its teeth into that delicious-looking bulb...

Fortunately, Yamamoto swooped the feline up by the armpits with his quick reflexes. "Oh no, you don't!" The silver cat chomped onto thin air. When it realised it bit nothing, it gave a confused look. Yamamoto heaved a sigh of relief. He wouldn't have known how to explain to the people at the hospital how his Little Guy got eaten by a cat.

But even in midair Gokudera's long tail swished, brushing past his member in the most tantalizing way possible. Growing playful, the feline swept its tail along the circumference of the tip. Yamamoto clenched his jaw, fighting the urge to come. "Gokudera…" He hissed, in both annoyance and pleasure.

And just like that, he came from a cat playing with his penis.

Some of the white liquid spilled onto Gokudera again, releasing an unhappy "_nyan!_" from it.

Before he could do anything about it Gokudera had disappeared from his clutches in a puff of mist. In its place was a naked, fully-grown human boy. Yamamoto's eyes widened. The sudden weight of the boy caused both of them to fall forward and crash onto the floor.

Pushing himself up he studied the boy once more, in wide-eyed amazement. Though he said the boy was naked, the stranger did have silver cat ears, and a tail swishing playfully. He had cropped moonlit hair, the same colour as his tail and cat ears, and the most stunning pair of jade-green eyes he had ever seen. The clear orbs were partially covered by his thick, long eyelashes, but it only made him all the more beautiful.

"Nyan!" The boy cried, wiggling his hip. Yamamoto finally realised his face had landed just below the boy's navel.

"Ah, sorry!" Yamamoto quickly sat up, face flushed bright red at the sudden appearance of this magnificent beauty. Then, he remembered. "Who are you?"

The boy tilted his head, wide eyes staring back at Yamamoto. "Gokudera?" He answered, questioning the baseball player's intellect. Gokudera then flipped into squatting position and scratched his ear with curled fingers.

"Gokudera?" Yamamoto fell backwards. "The cat?"

He shot him an annoyed look. "What, do I look like a shark to you? What else can I be nyan?" Gokudera stared at the sticky threads between his fingers. "Ugh, why am I covered in this goo nya?"

"Wha- Did- Did you just turned into a human?" Yamamoto was flustered. He conveniently ignored the fact that this beautiful being was covered in his cum.

Gokudera stopped scratching his ears and frowned. He stood up, hands on hips, looking down at the Japanese teen with degrading eyes. "Are you an idiot? What nonsense are you talking about? I am a cat nyan! Look, I have a tail!" He turned around and bent down, showing off his tail which is his pride.

But Yamamoto completely missed the memo, and looked instead at the parts which proved Gokudera is human, or a cat-human at least. For one, he had smooth, milky skin which was practically inviting people, inviting _him_, to touch. And his buttocks, wiggling from side to side…

"See that gorgeous tail? That's mine, and proof of Jyuudaime's grooming skil- nya!"

The carnal instincts of Yamamoto begun to take over. He sunk his hands into the soft skin. It was surprisingly perky, considering how skinny this boy is. The flesh fit into Yamamoto's large palms nicely. Just kneading it was enough to make the insides of the raven-haired boy burn.

"You idiot! What are you doing nya?" Gokudera knew he should get away, but it felt kind of good, too.

Yamamoto's hands got closer to the center. As he squeezed he parted the butt cheeks more, revealing bit by bit the sensitive pink ring of muscle at the center.

"St-Stop it, I say, stop it nyan! Or I shall report this to Jyuudaime and- nyan-!"

Yamamoto's finger tip was gently tickling the very delicate skin around the hole. It got slicker by the second. "Can a cat feel this good, Gokudera?"

Gokudera bared his fangs, unable to come up with a retort. His mind was beginning to blank out.

"Can cats do this to each other?" Without warning, the teenager pressed into the hole and pushed his fingertip in. Gokudera let out a sharp gasp as his knees wobbled violently. Yamamoto felt the ring of muscle contract around his finger and he pushed in deeper. Gokudera's insides were boiling hot and it squeezed so tightly against his finger.

He slid out again, scraping against the walls and drove back in again. Yamamoto thought he saw a slight smile on his face, so he continued with the action several times. Gokudera's knees collapsed and he fell onto the floor, his hip high in the air. His face was furiously red and his lips quivering as he panted.

Once again, Yamamoto took another take at re-evaluating his life. There he is, a healthy 14-year-old male who just came to a cat's blowjob and is now having foreplay with that same cat. But he, Gokudera, looks too human for his senses to process the fact that he is actually a cat. The curves, the gasps, the perspiration, the erotic hairless body… He still doesn't understand how whatever just happened happened. But he is the kind of guy who makes lemonades when life gives him lemons. So what matters now is that he is human enough to him. He wants the captivating beauty of the boy.

By then Gokudera's own member had grown stiff and sticky. His hand moved instinctively southwards, and wrapped around the length. He rubbed fast and hard, like the hyperactive cat Jyuudaime said he is. Up down up down up down. He hasn't done this before so he didn't know if it was right or wrong. But oh it felt so good, an immense form of relief, like scratching an itch that's going to stay for hours.

Yamamoto chuckled. "Guess you still had some animal instincts in you."

With that the older boy scissored the hole apart with another finger, and pushed it in. Gokudera let out a breathy groan, eyes shut in delight. His muscles clenched even tighter onto Yamamoto's fingers, as the latter continued teasing him. His fingers parted, danced and tickled Gokudera's insides, in turn making Gokudera rub his penis even faster.

Yamamoto's movements slowed down and eventually stopped. Hand still moving on his member, Gokudera turned back to check, eyes still narrowed from the mounting pleasure, his lips dripping a bit of saliva.

Yamamoto stood up, so that Gokudera could see what the older boy intended for him to see. The long, thick penis, flushed and slick with pre-cum. "Sorry Gokudera, I'm going to explode if I don't do this."

Though Gokudera had no idea what he was talking about, he got an idea after he felt something big poking at his entrance. It eased the ring apart, slowly and carefully. The moment, and gratification, seemed to last forever.

"The tip's in," announced Yamamoto.

"What's that nyan?" Gokudera panted, pumping even faster on his member.

Yamamoto laughed sheepishly. "The uh, toy." Then he placed his hands on Gokudera's bum again, steadying him. "This time I'm going to go all the way."

Without waiting for an answer, Yamamoto squeezed his shaft inside. As he pushed in he could hear the wet, squishy sound. It took a long time because Gokudera was just too tense. "Ugh, so tight..." he breathed. "Relax, Gokudera."

Gokudera was on the verge of tears, face flushed a rosy red. "It's- It's too big, nya! I can't take it nyan!" All the while his hand never stopped moving.

Yamamoto remembered that his father is going to be back soon, so he'd have to finish this faster. "Sorry Gokudera," he said, before forcefully thrusting the rest of his length inside.

"Nyan!" Gokudera's back arched, feeling a shudder race down his spine. He breathed heavily, a tint of smile on his face at the intense gratification coursing through his nerves.

"I'm going to start moving." With that, he slid his member out, watching it pull the muscle out at the same time, and then push back in, the ring moving in as well. He started at a slow pace.

On the third thrust, a wave of ecstasy washed over Gokudera. He threw his head back, and saw a blinding white light that flashed for a nanosecond. His member felt like it erupted, sending thick, gooey cum all over his hand, his stomach, his chest and the floor.

Gokudera panted, resting his head on the floor. His stomach heaved up and down. "Ha... ha... That felt... That felt good, nya..." A strong rhythm continued pulsating in his body.

Yamamoto, obviously not finished yet, pouted. Then, he flipped the exhausted Gokudera over and spread his legs further apart, resting them on his broad shoulders. A startled Gokudera cried, "Wai- What are you-? Nya!"

Yamamoto continued thrusting. Gokudera's leg kicked up in reflex but Yamamoto held it down. Gokudera feels much tighter in this position.

"St-Stop it! I'm really tired now nya. You are such an idiot nyan!" Gokudera grunted, obviously mad.

But his body was telling Yamamoto a different story. The boy's penis gradually stood up again, tinted a deep, rosy red and oozing with cum. Wet, sloshing sound is now accompanied by slapping sounds, as Yamamoto picked up pace and hit faster and faster. His members scraped the walls of Gokudera with each thrust, feeling the heat inside the boy.

Nothing else was heard between these two other than heavy pantings. Gokudera swished his tail in Yamamoto's face in the midst of the heat, encouraging Yamamoto to grab the tail. Gokudera's chest heaved up. "Nyan! No, that's sensitive..."

That only made Yamamoto all the more determined. He opened his mouth and, with his lips covering his teeth, nibbled on the sensitive tail.

Gokudera let out a sharp gasp and winced. "Nya!" Without warning, the boy came, spilling as much thick, hot liquid as he did before. Some of it got on to Yamamoto's face. His muscles tensed heavily, squeezing on Yamamoto's penis hard.

Yamamoto grunted. "I'm coming, too, Gokudera!" He pulled out immediately, but not fast enough to aim elsewhere. His cum shot all over Gokudera, on top of the boy's own, and onto his face and hair.

From a distance, Gokudera was simply a mess, being drenched, from head to toe, in dubious milky fluid. His large, jade green eyes stared back at Yamamoto, fingers curled and resting on top of his chest, tail swishing. As he let out a mew, sticky threads hang from his sharp teeth.

* * *

He cleaned the room and bathed Gokudera after that. (Yamamoto learnt that Human-Gokudera apparently hates bath as much as Cat-Gokudera does.) He supposed he had blacked out after cleaning, because the next thing he remembered was waking up. He quickly looked around to find Gokudera the cat sleeping soundly on his bed. Yamamoto knocked his head for his stupidity. Of course it was all a dream. How can animals turn into humans? And pretty ones at that? Oh brain, that was a good one. Yamamoto shook his head and went for a refreshing shower himself.

When he returned to his room, he froze in his tracks. On his bed, was the naked boy with cat ears and tail in his dream. Impatient, the boy yelled, "Hurry up, nyan! Let's play that game again!"

* * *

**A/N**: Thank you for reading! It's fun to write Gokuneko, because he's always naked, and hornier than normal Gokudera, since he's a cat and all. (I think) Also, writing this AU where Gokudera the Right Hand Man, and in effect the entire mafia story, doesn't exist at all made me realize how mundane Yamamoto and Tsuna's lives would be.

But enough deep thoughts for now! For the sharp-eyed, the title was taken from a line of a, ahem, hentai manga I was reading. But c'mon, it's pretty true isn't it?

Anyway! Thank you for reading, and leave a review/PM if you have any ideas, or any pointers for me to improve please!


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